Dear Muthafudgin Diary
This is really bad,
I used to be one of those people who boasted about not getting addicted to stuff but…
That has changed, apparently
I’m addicted to Coffee. Yes; how do I know?
It isn’t an itch, I’m not telling people I’ll suck them off for some beans, no
As the caffeine wears off at night, I find myself floating in a murky pool of loathing, there’s a dark sense of self, I am acutely aware of the slow pace of my existence and its blaring disgrace. And I can’t write for jack.
I wish I were dead.
My first thought was “you better not have any coffee tomorrow,”
But I needed to sort this apocalypse now and figured “see if it’s the coffee, have some now.”
And sure enough, half a cup of half a teaspoon of some good ol’ roasted beans and I’m typing away with a lit mind and a brighter disposition
It doesn’t sound all that bad, really. It’s not cocaine or meth or death
I’ve never liked depending on things though…

So I’m hooked on coffee, and for some reason out of all of these years it has only recently started to be profoundly psychoactive on my brain, what a way to usher in the new year!

P.S. To think just thirty minutes ago I was struggling to write a sentence and here I am having written quite a bit!

Cheerio! Coffeenoid out

La nuit du café noir.


5 thoughts on “OH NO…

  1. There’s nothing really wrong with drinking coffee, out of all the caffeine addictions coffee is fairly mild. Better then drinking energy drinks, and even like ‘soda’ addictions (I think that’s what you guys call fizzy drinks) though not having much caffeine still do a lot of damage through carbonation in them. You’ve just joined the 70% of working people that use coffee as a motivator to do everything from mundane office work to fine art. Your buzz will even out eventually and you may need more but there’s not too many ill side effects, coffee is great, it is the closest, most legal and safest amphetamine you can do! But you will get used to it and you will get headachy if you stop the amount you’re drinking all of a sudden. I’d read up on it, I’m pretty sure it has some health benefits also, it did for me anyway when I was getting tension headaches. Sorry for the long winded rambling!

    Liked by 1 person

    • i love long ramblings! feels very involved and makes me feel like “oh wow somebody is taking the time to communicate with me when they don’t have to”. so thanks for the advice; fortunately i only had half a teaspoon so it’s not such a bad starting point. i’ve been having coffee for years though, and the post was just to express my surprise as to why it was finally working in that expected way. anyway, thanks again. have a good one.

      Liked by 1 person

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